Much as I don't like the phrase "the new normal", it is an appropriate descriptor for the shenanigans that have become common place with "modern" airlines. No post-COVID vacation for those who dare to fly economy (i.e., most of us common folk) seems to be complete without a good dose of innovative ways that the airlines will unapologetically inconvenience passengers or steal their money. My recent trip to Spain was no exception.
It all started with planning a trip to Athens (Greece, not Georgia) that went amuck last year. In May of 2023, after spending countless hours finding a balance between a reasonable fare and a reasonable route, I purchased two roundtrip tickets from Seattle to Athens for a trip that I thought I would surely (a) enjoy and (b) use as scheduled in September of 2023 when the long crazy summer travel season was over. But COVID19 had other ideas and after struggling with a bad bout of the disease in April of 2023, the virus decided to take up residence in my thyroid gland. By September, I was in full scale hyperthyroidism complete with a not insignificant chance that my leaking thyroid would dump enough hormone in my body in too short a time and thereby end my life. But, it didn't -- that was good news. The rest was pretty much bad news.
As I spent week after week sick and miserable, it made me even more miserable to think of Air Canada running off with a few thousand dollars of airfare and seat reservations. Like most other airlines, Air Canada could care less how sick I was and how genuinely unable to travel I had become. When I reluctantly cancelled our flights and learned that Air Canada was only going to charge $199 in change fees per ticket, I was thrilled. I succumbed to the optimistic thought that I might have a vacation out of the whole mess after all.
Alas, when I went to use my "airline credits" in early 2024 to book another flight to Europe, I tried flight after flight, reservation after reservation, only to run into the "You cannot use airline credits to book this flight" error. An hour on the phone with Expedia and the agent reassured me that indeed I could use airline credits to book a new flight. Another half an hour later and the agent was "surprised" that I could not. An hour later, a new Expedia agent assured me I could in fact use the airline credits. Another thirty minutes later, the new agent was surprised once again that I could not and referred me to Air Canada. Three hours later on the phone with Air Canada, an agent in Newfoundland had found no reason why my airline credits were unusable and found some magical way to rebook the flights. Apparently, the agent's magic touch cost another $200 on top of the $199 change fee (per ticket) and also involved routes that, if I had any choice, I wouldn't choose. So, I didn't.
Athens was out of the question. But a trip to Barcelona in late winter didn't sound bad at all. Surprisingly, Air Canada agreed. And resigned, I once again paid over $150 to secure seats on the longest leg of the flight -- from Canada to Europe and back. $79 a person for an ordinary economy seat that wasn't right next to the bathroom or in a middle seat. Sigh.
After so many hours on the phone though, I was worn down and with so many different and unanticipated fees, I thought that surely the airline shenanigans were over.
I boarded my flight to Montreal from Tampa (the first leg in a two leg flight to Barcelona) and all seemed to be well until we hit what the flight attendant continued to label "moderate" turbulence an hour into a three hour flight. I've learned that "moderate" turbulence is enough to make you want to toss your breakfast into one of those little bags that the airlines used to provide in the seat in front of you. Not to mention the not insignificant panic that goes along with a jet bouncing all over the place at 30,000 feet.
All the while during this impressive battle between the weather and the airplane, the flight attendant continued to apologize, over and again, for the turbulence. More than once, I mused that (a) turbulence is not your fault and (b) I would prefer an apology for all those who had been price gouged and exploited in economy class (and I have no doubt that would amount to most of us).
Finally, the turbulence ended as the plane touched down in Montreal, Canada. Lucky me, I still had 3.5 hours remaining in my original 4 hour layover, I presumed that I had more than enough time to get something reasonable to eat and reach my gate for the next flight. After being routed around a maze of Disney-like lines, having my boarding pass checked five times, and my passport three times, I landed in a single security checkpoint for over a hundred passengers that, like me, were simply trying to not enter Canada but just connect to another flight. Never mind that we had already passed through security at our originating airport (TPA). By the time I was finally released from the clutches of airport security and arrived at my departure gate, it was 90 minutes before departure time and ironically, I had landed at the exact same gate I had disembarked from several hours earlier.
The shenanigans continued. My traveling companion finally arrived at the gate less than half an hour before the flight to Spain closed for departure. Despite paying for seats together, Air Canada had moved her from the window seat located just one seat away from my aisle seat to a middle seat somewhere else on the airplane. And, of course, they had done this without refunding the seat reservation fee or informing my traveling companion of the change until she was en route.
After confronting the gate agent on the seat shenanigans, she moved us to an exit row... still a middle seat for my traveling companion but a window seat for me. We were reassured that both seats had extra leg room and reclining seats. Knowing better than to argue any further with anyone who worked for the airlines, we mumbled a half-hearted thank you and boarded. As for my reclining seat on an overnight flight over the Atlantic Ocean, I ran into this little piece of information immediately upon finding my seat:
Thank you Air Canada.
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