Greetings from the Yard Waste Monster

Imagine having a house guest that litters the floor every single day with little pieces of this and that which are difficult to sweep, annoying to the feet, and worse, allergenic to most.  Imagine allowing the guest to stay and inviting more like it to come on in and join the party.  Most of us can't get away with being that kind of houseguest, but I know someone who gets away with it en masse in the American Southeast.

That someone would be the Live Oak, trademark tree of the South, a specimen that is as stunning in its breadth as the coastal redwood is in its height.  Its canopy, though nowhere near as tall as the firs, cedars, and redwoods of the west, can stretch as far as half a football field, providing condominiums, apartments, and various other housing arrangements to diverse species of birds, squirrels, and other small animals that roam the South.   As the live oak matures, Spanish Moss will drape itself across the tree's massive branches, creating a look that many describe as romantic and most will capture in a photograph or two or three or seven or more.

The Live Oak is more than just a pretty addition to home landscaping.  Its wood is so dense that it is rumored to have earned the USS Constitution the Nickname "Old Ironsides" during the War of 1812. Apparently, cannonballs will just bounce off the side of a live oak. For the more ordinary person who doesn't regularly shoot cannonballs at trees in the yard, the Live Oak serves as a windbreak, protecting homes in the South from all too frequent tropical storm and hurricane winds.   They are cold resistant, deer resistant, wind resistant, and growth resistant.  A live oak can grow up to 60 feet tall, but don't hold your breath.   While slow growing, it will host many a guest during its lifetime, from bird to squirrel to Spanish moss to fern and to other air plants.  The South would simply not be the same without this majestic tree.  

But like most things that bless our yards with beauty and presence, the live oak has a downside, which Southerners graciously put up with in exchange for its shade, protection, and beauty.   Though few live oaks lose all of their leaves every year, they are still technically deciduous and the leaf shedding cycle can extend for months through relatively warm winters.   While holding on to some of its leaves throughout the year, the live oak nevertheless specializes in shedding something during every month of the year.  Whether leaves or moss or limbs or twigs, there is always something on the ground under a live oak that irritates the feet and invites the rake.

This is especially true after hurricane winds have blown by parts of the South. During this special time, the Live Oak takes on another persona -- that of Yard Waste Monster.  A single Live Oak tree has been shown to produce more yard waste per cubic inch than any other tree or combination of landscaping plants in the history of the world.

And since hurricane season comes during the hottest and muggiest months of the year, cleaning up what the Yard Waste Monster dishes out can be quite the adventure in sweat, perspiration, dirt, grit, and the like. But, as many who have cleaned up after a hurricane will tell you, having the opportunity to clean up after one or more Yard Waste Monsters implies that a home remains standing under the canopy of the live oak.  And, when considering the darker consequences of a hurricane, that blessing is worth its weight in well... Yard Waste.

This blog was written a week after Hurricane Irma when I returned to my home in Florida and found that the greatest burden I needed to bear was cleaning up 1.2 million leaves and twigs from my postage stamp yard.   My gratitude for Tampa Bay being spared from the eye of the full force of Irma is immeasurable.